Report on Dreamtime Sounds

Two years ago I taught a class on healing with Himalayan metal singing bowls to a group of women in Sarasota, FL via Skype. At the end of the class they asked me if I could make a recording of the bowls specifically for helping one to go to sleep. I made the recording right away but then didn't know how to actually put it on a CD so I have never done anything with it. Tonight I finally figured out! Really, it was easy- I just had to do it, as it turned out. I am listening to it right now on my good stereo. Up until tonight I had only ever heard it on the computer!

That was about three minutes into the track. After that paragraph I had to go lie down on the floor as I could no longer focus on writing. I disappeared into the sounds. My breathing got very still, as it does in deep meditation. Images came into my mind as in a dream but I don't remember what any of them were.

I had forgotten. I hadn't listened to it in about a year. When I first made it I played it numerous times before going to sleep and I had to conclude that it must work because I never heard the whole thing. Tomorrow I will call a sound tech in Providence and see if he can clean up a few ambient sounds which were caused by me moving around the bowls when I was recording it. Then I can call my friend Nadia and tell her that I will have their CD ready soon!

More steps in the right direction...

Just Breathe...

Tonight I am exhausted but I wanted to do a quick post before I go to bed. I know there is something that wants to be said.

When I was in my early teens I used to "try" to meditate. The big distraction was my breath! If only I could breath totally silently then I was sure I'd be able to meditate. When I got older I learned an amazing mediation technique. Meditate on the sound and the movement of the breath. What a revelation! The one constant as long as I am alive- I am breathing. It was like some major secret had just been revealed to me.

Tomorrow I do a kirtan. Tonight I came up with a very sweet and simple melody for a chant to Lord Shiva. I am looking forward to sharing it. I am grateful that each day I am getting more response to my work up here. It feels good.

What Makes a Story Worth Telling?

I just watched Nick Cave's very myopic movie "20,000 Days on Earth"- I LOVED it!!! If you don't like Nick Cave you would probably find it extremely irritating at best. It could be interpreted as narcissistic I suppose. I was captivated by his music the first time I saw "Wings of Desire"- not music I would hang out and listen to ordinarily but in a particular context I find it hypnotizing. When I saw the Leonard Cohen tribute film "I'm Your Man" I saw a different side of him and found him not only fascinating as a musician but as a person- eloquent and thoughtful.

So I was very excited for this film to come out and was deeply disappointed not to be able to see it at the time. I was so happy when I saw tonight that it was on Amazon Prime. My TV is hooked up to a great stereo so it was perfect.

I was so taken by it within the first 30 seconds or so that I grabbed a notebook and began taking notes. It was so meaty and I knew that I would quickly forget much of what struck me.

Some of the things I wrote down (and some slightly adapted for the purpose of this blog):
      Wonderfully myopic film by/about Nick Cave. I am haunted by his music. His father [said to him after a concert] "You are like an angel."
      Thoughtful, beautifully eloquent
      Biggest fear "Losing my memory... because memory is what we are."
      "Those moments when the gears of the heart really change."
     He was talking about daredevil stunts they used to do as kids and I thought, My childhood was thwarted by fear.
     Before you go on stage you don't know how you're going to do it. It seems impossible. Then something happens when you get on the stage. Everything else falls away.

Here is where I have to interject and put in my two cents worth. He is talking about the transformation that happens for the performer and by virtue of that to the audience, and he tells a story about Nina Simone- a concert where he opened up for her and she was raging before the concert- angry and demanding, the impression of someone snarling like an animal and scaring everyone around her. She comes out on stage and she walks up to the edge of the stage and stares the audience down. Then she goes and sits down at the piano, takes her gum out of her mouth, sticks it on top of the piano and pounds on the keys... And then she goes through this total transformation, and she is loving what she is doing. She connects with the audience, they connect with her. Everyone is completely blown away. This is his example of the transformative power of the stage, where everything else disappears and for a little while you can forget who you are.

Here is where I disagree- maybe it's just a matter of semantics. I'm not sure- but my take on this is that, first of all, this is like life. In fact, this is life. So many things that we are faced with- and we say, "Nope, I can't do this one. Too much. Too big. No can do." But it's one of those situations we can't walk away from- whether it's because it's our calling and our vocation, whether it is an obligation that we must fulfill. Doesn't matter. We're there and we have to walk through because we're in it for the long haul. And when we step into it- like stepping on the stage- we remember who we are and why we are here and there is no question that, Yes- I can do this! In fact many times we don't even think about it because there is no choice to be made. We feel the fear, we acknowledge it (or not) and we step up to the plate, and all the other stuff just falls away because we have just met our true calling. Not necessarily in terms of our life's work, nothing so grandiose, but for that moment, for that situation our job is to be present and to handle whatever is in our face. Could be a job interview, could be a sick child, could be a performance... it's whatever our fear is in the moment. Every moment, every choice. That is our life.

This movie is about self-exploration. It's about calling up and honoring the ghosts of the past. Our life doesn't become a story until we tell it. When we are in it, it just seems chaotic and confused. It's in the telling that it becomes a story.

What makes a story worth telling? If it has value to us, then it is a story worth telling. Maybe we just need to find the right person to tell it to. I told my therapist today that I was there to untangle the threads of the past. That's what I feel like this movie is doing and maybe that is why I was so moved by it. That and the fact that the cinematography and the sound- not just his music but the accompanying sound- is absolutely brilliant.
     
 
 
 
 
 

The Sync Project

This just popped up on the radar. I have been very busy today sorting out paperwork- aaaaaarghh!- and suddenly here comes this brilliant inspiration about which I am wildly excited! The Sync Project- THESYNCPROJECT.COM- all about researching, understanding and harnessing the healing power of music. In my world it doesn't get much better than that.
Please check it out!!!

And while you're at it- watch this video if you haven't already seen it. And of course if you have, then I have no doubt that you will want to watch it again! And then you will absolutely want to watch the movie Alive Inside! So inspiring!

Revisiting Netherlands

Spent a long time tonight updating events and contact information. should have gone quickly but I added a bunch of pictures to the contact page. Then I had a hard time actually sharing the posts on FB and Twitter so I thought I would write something too!

I always get inspired going through my pictures and revisiting past events, sessions, workshops, pictures of instruments and looking forward to what's coming up. In the end of April I will be going to Holland to teach a workshop. My first trip to Holland was in 2012 and I am so looking forward to going back.

Here are some pics from the last trip to Netherlands.

Contact

 

Rosemary Warburton- Sound Therapist, 

Licensed Massage Therapist
Email: soundbodycenter@gmail.com

Phone: 727.479.9916
Website: www.wholisticsound.com
Facebook: www.facebook.com/wholisticsound
Twitter: @WholisticSound

Wholistic Sound is located in Tiverton, Rhode Island, 30 minutes from Newport, RI and 30 minutes from Providence. I offer private sound healing sessions, personalized sound healing retreats for individuals and couples, healing sound journeys, classes and workshops. I also sell Himalayan singing bowls, crystal bowls, tuning forks, books, CDs and other sound healing tools.

Hours are by appointment only.
To set up an appointment for a private session, host a workshop or Healing Sound Journey or find out about our personalized sound healing retreats, please send an email to soundbodycenter@gmail.com or call 727-479-9916.
 

Moving Forward

I am very happy and grateful to be feeling relatively settled in my house so that every day now I get to spend a fair amount of time either playing music or doing something related to sound healing- instead of just unpacking and organizing! One or two days a week I am off to South County to give massage and sound healing treatments to oncology patients, which is really an incredible gift for both them and for me.

Today I spent several hours practicing my harmonium, combining a couple of different chants to Shiva, the transformer, for the yoga and chant class tonight. The icicles are melting, spring is around the corner and with that transformation is in the air! I am starting to figure out the chords with relative ease now which is really a big step. Also, for some reason that I don't really understand, my guitar playing seems to have improved dramatically recently even though it seems like I don't play that much. I feel like it has something to do with the pretty constant immersion in some form of sound that, even though my actual technique isn't nearly as good as it was when I was younger (since I took about a 15 year break from it), my sensitivity to sound has greatly increased and by virtue of that, so has my creativity. Whatever it is- I'm liking it!

You Never Know (And Sometimes You Do)

Slowly starting to get new clients in my new space. Today someone came for a session who I met almost two years ago at an Expressive Art Therapy training I had taken. Turns out she saved my contact information and last week contacted me to make an appointment for a session. We hadn't had any contact since we had taken the class together.

So interesting to me when you don't have any idea that what you shared at some past time has had an impact on someone. You might not have even known they were listening or remotely interested. I have had people contact me for a session sometimes years after they came to one event that I did.

So, part of the moral of the story is, don't be afraid to share what you do- and don't assume that no one is listening. You never who you might reach- usually just when you least expect it!

A few years ago when I was in St. Petersburg I taught a class for the Florida State Massage Therapy Association. It was an opportunity for me to network and reach a fairly broad audience and for Licensed Massage Therapists to get a few of their necessary continuing education credits. About three years later I got a call from a woman who had been at that meeting. I had played a crystal bowl and she told me she had never forgotten the sound of that bowl and had wanted one ever since. She was just waiting until she could afford it. She came to the center later that week and bought her first crystal bowl.

And this is the other part of the moral of the story. That is how sound is. Sometimes it just penetrates through all the other clutter and chaos and you know when it strikes you. You know that it just changed you- or brought you back home in a way that nothing else could in such a brief instant.

Jai Uttal- Oh Krishna....Sweet Kirtan

I am very tired tonight and my mind is rather pleasantly empty. When I thought about what to write- my commitment to shipping something every day- this beautiful kirtan by Jai Uttal came into my mind. It was a very lovely evening in Miami about four years ago, at Trinity Episcopal Cathedral, without a doubt one of the most beautiful churches I have ever been in. The scene, with the lights changing from reds to blues to purples, the angels behind them, the ethereal painting on the ceiling and the sweet beautiful music, was something out of this world.

 

Benefits of Chanting Sanskrit

Shri Brahmananda Sarasvati (Ramamurti S. Mishra, MD) my teacher's guru

My beloved teacher, Swami Sivananda Sarasvati

Reasons for learning Sanskrit through chanting, according to Shri Brahmananda Sarasvati:

• You learn Sanskrit naturally and effortlessly.
• You enter your being through discipline of meditation, relaxation and concentration.
• You experience natural unity and integrity with the world.
• You receive natural and holistic healing, unifying body, mind and spirit.
• By the radiation of natural health on all levels you help others in the same direction.
• You experience the integrity of all world languages through the vibration of Sanskrit language with chanting.
• You enter into meditation in a natural way.
• You experience natural and spontaneous revelation of freedom and enlightenment, the light of natural awareness.

The Sanskrit language, known as “The mother of all tongues” is one of the oldest known languages, if not the oldest, on our planet. The written alphabet is called “devanāgari”. It is said that the language derived from the cities of the devas, “the shining ones” (“nagar” is the word for city). Each letter was derived from an icon of one of the many diverse Goddesses. The great Devi created 50 subforms of herself, the mātrikas or “little mothers” whose names are still recited daily by devout shakti worshippers. Each letter has its own meditative quality and vṛtti (perturbation of the natural mind) associated with it. 

Because each phenome in the Sanskrit language has its own vibrational quality, with the proper pronunciation one can attain states of mastery- theoretically even if you did not know the actual meaning of the words! This idea has another level of importance, because if the language is mispronounced one can inadvertently be bringing in unwanted vibratory energies. For example, “the pigeon”... rājakapotāsana... the word “rāja” means king or sovereign. Leave off the long “a” and the word becomes “raja”- which translates as either pollen of flowers or menstrual excrement! Properly pronounced it really translates as “the royal pigeon pose”. When one is teaching [yoga] one can be adding to this energy of excellence through the correct pronunciation of Sanskrit.

In 1786 Sir William Jones, one of the first people to seriously study the language outside of India had this to say about it:

The Sanskrit language, whatever be its antiquity, is of a wonderful structure; more perfect than the Greek, more copious than the Latin, and more exquisitely refined than either, yet bearing to both of them a stronger affinity, both in the roots of verbs and in the forms of grammar, than could possibly have been produced by accident; so strong, indeed, that no philologer could examine them all three, without believing them to have sprung from some common source, which, perhaps, no longer exists.

My personal experience of studying and chanting Sanskrit is that it charges the brain, balances the nervous system, creates new neural pathways and improves memory. 

This short video is from an introductory Sanskrit class for yoga teachers that I taught at Living Room Yoga in St. Petersburg, FL several years ago. The actual devanagari letters are below so you can chant along.

 

Sound Inspiration

Here are just a few of my favorite movies about the power of sound and music to unite and to heal:

• Genghis Blues- The story of blind Chicago-based bluesman Paul Pena, his personal discovery of Tuvan throat-singing and his ensuing visit to the Republic of Tuva, a tiny country on the northern edge of Mongolia.

Tuvan shaman dancing near Kyzyl

• 1 Giant Leap: In short, watch the video below. This is one short excerpt- absolutely exquisite. Musical duo Duncan Bridgeman and Jamie Catto traveled to Asia, Africa and India recording tracks on their laptops and then having other brilliant musicians from around the world laying more tracks over them and interviewing fascinating minds such as Kurt Vonnegut, Tom Robbins, Dennis Hopper and many others- a blend of philosophy and music. Music unites individuals, cultures and minds. Music brings out people's inner innate joy. Watch the movie and clear the room so you can dance your way through it, because you will want to!

• The Story of the Weeping Camel: A most surprising and fascinating documentary. A nomadic Mongolian family's newest camel colt is rejected by its mother. As a last resort, after trying everything they could to get the mother to accept her newborn, the family brings in a musician to perform a very special ritual.

 

If you've already seen all three of these films contact me- there are many more I can recommend! What am I going to do tonight? Get out my flute and my drum, clear some space in my living room and watch 1 Giant Leap again!

Where Are You Now?

I ran across an interesting article yesterday discussing how ADHD is not actually a "disease". http://themindunleashed.org/2014/10/adhd-real-disease-says-leading-neuroscientist.html. It is a subject of great interest to me. It seems to me that there are inherent problems in our general environment and the way that kids are taught in school these days- and not just "these days" but for many, many years. Our schools and our society do not nurture the way that kids minds and bodies naturally operate- which is pretty much to be full of energy and, to some extent, all over the place due to their rabid curiosity about the world! Kids minds are so expansive, open and free and from the minute they walk into their first day of school, with few exceptions (the great progressive schools and alternative learning environments), they begin to be constricted and stuffed into one box or another. Also, there is so much mental and auditory stimulus directed at them (and at all of us) through today's technology as well as serious EMF pollution that it's a wonder any of us can think straight! 

Personally I think there are numerous contributing factors to the disproportionate rise of so-called ADHD. One obvious one is diet- we have to make a concerted effort seek out food with good nutritional value and we are limited by time. If a growing body is not being given good whole food it will impact the development of the brain. The brain is part of the body- hello. We live in a fast-food society- not necessarily just the food we ingest in our bodies but also how we feed our minds. We have kids (and adults) that are addicted to video games, cell phones and computers. It is easier these days to find out about whatever bit of trivia- or important information- we need at any given moment by googling or reading a quick summary on Wikipedia than by actually reading a book.

Multitasking was once the job of computers. It has fallen into our language as a desired "skill" which does not encourage focusing on one task until it is completed. I know people who take pride in their ability to multitask. If we can talk on the phone at the same time as we are doing research on the computer, eat lunch at our desk, watch a webcast while making a necklace, or listen in on a call while we are out for a run, we have just collapsed time a little bit more and bought ourselves a few extra minutes. I had a massage client once who wanted to be on a conference call while she was receiving her massage! I told her no, if she wanted to have a massage with me at that time she had to forgo the phone call. I suppose for some people that is part of their "normal". It is definitely not how I work though, as a healer. When the mind is under that much pressure, to be constantly busy, how can it learn to relax and let go? It is being pushed to the max.

Julian Treasure's talk on sound health also brings up a point which seems very relevant to this topic. He talks about "schizophonia"- the dislocation between what we see and what we hear. I am in my kitchen but I am talking to my sister in Arizona. How much attention am I paying to my present space- or am I present at all? This issue has become very pervasive because today we have the opportunity at all times to be connecting with those who are not present with us- who are not in our space, in our house, in our time zone. On one level I believe that this is one of the gifts of the internet- and in fact I actually think that it is the higher purpose of the internet. On the flip side I feel that it can be very damaging to our sense of self and to our sense of place in time. It may be even more so to young people because they have barely begun to develop a strong sense of self and they are actually being encouraged by our technology to split off from it. We must vigilant about how we use our technology and, in some sense, "protect" our minds.

And how does this relate to sound healing? (It better relate because I have a whole chapter on it in my book!) Sound has the ability to bring us fully into the present literally in a matter of seconds and sometimes in less than an instant. One of the simplest ways to do this, when you feel you are scattered, disconnected or not fully available to the person or the task before you is simply to pull your attention back to your breath. Stop- and listen to the sound of your breath with your very next inhale. Where are you now?

Nina Hagen 1008 Indian Nights

Singing a Nina Hagen devotional tonight at a kirtan in Newport brought to mind this amazing kirtan- in my opinion one of the best ever recorded! About once a year I have to revisit it.

Things are starting to heat up a bit around here- people calling for sessions, chanting groups and wanting to organize group sound healing meditations. I'm ready!

Preparing to Practice

We can jump into anything and wing it if we are feeling so moved and have enough information, knowledge, experience or background at our disposal... but when we prepare for the task, the event, the talk- what a difference that can make to the outcome. Spontaneity is a wonderful thing. We shouldn't leave it out of the equation. Being open and having the ability to making a change in the moment as the circumstances, situation or mood guide us, is important and may also lead to results beyond what we might have hoped for or imagined.

A few years ago I heard somewhere that Sting always has his band do an hour of yoga before a concert. Last week a friend of mine and I started teaching a class on Mindful Yoga & Sacred Chant. The effect of chanting after doing an hour of yoga is profound! An hour of yoga is plenty enough to balance the mind and body, open up the lungs and prepare one for a luscious round of chanting or singing.

Tonight we taught our second class in a series of five. I had been practicing a particular chant all week. It was new to me and I am not very good on the harmonium so I needed a lot of practice to feel comfortable. Every day this week I sat down with it and practiced, but I didn't always spend a lot of time actually preparing myself to chant. I would do a little breathing and a bit of warm up vocals but I tend to be impatient so I would often jump right into singing or chanting without being fully warmed up.

Both last week and this week in our class I was amazed at the difference when I opened my mouth to sing after doing a full hour of yoga first. My body was relaxed. I had more lung capacity and my whole being felt really open, allowing my voice to expand with an unusual fullness and strength. Very exciting.

And can't we apply this to any endeavor? Preparation must become part of the practice.

 

Hanuman Leading Kirtan

Bells of Mindfulness

Sister Dang Nhiem with her beautiful teachings of the bells and the breath has been in my mind all day.  The teaching is simple and beautiful. There is nothing I can add to it.

I did the above drawing in a workshop after we had done a vocal meditation on the chakra tones. I was playing a singing bowl at the same time and this was how I felt at the end of the meditation. It was a revelation about the balance of energy.

Sarasvati, She Who Flows

The goddess Sarasvati is the Hindu deity of learning, creativity and knowledge- the goddess who revealed language and writing to man. She is the consort of Lord Brahma, the creator in the Hindu trinity. In the Vedas, Sarasvati is personified as a river goddess. At one time the Sarasvati River was the greatest river in India, originating in the Himalayas. The goddess Sarasvati is "She Who Flows." All of the creative endeavors that flow through us are through the grace of Sarasvati. When we begin any creative project it is helpful to invoke the Mother Goddess of art, music, language, learning, literature, science. Her flowing energy purifies our mind and provides the stream of inspiration just as the water cleanses and purifies the earth and our bodies. She is also called "She who dwells in sound."

Today I spent the afternoon practicing the harmonium, singing sargam, and practicing a Sarasvati chant in the "bilawal thaat"- which, in Indian music, is the equivalent to the Western major scale.

Here is a beautiful Sarasvati raga by my teacher Silvia Nakkach. Enjoy!

Now It's My Turn! (or What I Am Taking From "Your Turn Challenge")

Today is the 40th day of My Turn Challenge. It became "my turn" when, after 7 days, the official "Your Turn Challenge" was over and I decided to keep going, committing myself to shipping every day which, for me, means writing a blog post every day.

In the ancient Indian healing science of Ayurveda, it is said that it takes 40 days to break an habit, change a habit or create a new habit. Although it takes 21 days for a habit to create new neural pathways in the brain, it actually takes 40 days for those pathways to become fixed as a new habit.

I feel like I'm well on my way with the commitment to keeping up with my blog and believe it or not, my life is changing because of it. I wake up in the morning thinking about what I am going to write and can't wait to get to it. Last night I didn't get my blog posted until something like 11:53 pm but I still got it done before I turned into a pumpkin!

The word "practice" comes to mind. This is a practice. I am practicing essentially to become a bit more structured, a bit more disciplined, so that I can continue to make room for all the things I want to do, create, and accomplish- on a daily, weekly, yearly and lifelong basis- different levels of goals.

Yesterday I decided to add a new My Turn Challenge to my day and I have committed to doing a simple yet powerful group of exercises every day for 7 days- The Five Tibetan Rites of Rejuvenation. About 12 years ago I did them consistently for two months. I began to feel very positive changes in my physiology after as little as two weeks and I would have to say that after two months the change was quite dramatic. Then one day I had a bad fall playing tennis a little too ambitiously, damaging my wrist and my knee, and I never got back to practicing the Five Rites consistently again. I do them sporadically, once very few days or weeks, usually when I have some sort of pain in my body which they typically seem to relieve quickly. I want to do them, I know they work wonders for me but I don't. What's up with that? Who knows... I don't need to figure it out- I just need to make a change.

Yesterday, waking up with a pain in my neck from carrying wood, I decided it was time to do them and then I thought, "Well, what if I just commit to doing them every day for a week just like I did with blogging?" Start with a simple doable goal. So that's My Turn Challenge for this week. I'm off and running with the blogging- I won't let go of one to pick up the other.

I also just started a book that my therapist recommended to me- Vinegar Into Honey by Ron Leifer. I was talking to him yesterday about the challenge of finding time to read during the day. Why should that be a challenge? I love to read but of late it is. I start to read just before I go to bed when I am so tired I can't read more than two pages typically! It suddenly occurred to me that I could use the My Turn Challenge idea for this too and I decided that when I wake up in the morning- before I check my phone for messages, emails, updates and suddenly discover an hour has gone by- that I will pick up the book and read for at least 15 minutes. Then I can get up do "The 5 Tibetans" (which is exactly what I did this morning- Day 2 of Tibetan Challenge).

One of my bigger goals is to finish writng a book on sound healing that I started well over ten years ago. What I am anticipating is that by getting in the flow of writing in my blog on a daily basis, very soon I will get back to writing something every day in my book and one day in the next year or so it will be done, completed, finito!

The working title, by the way is Sound Possibilities: Restoring Balance and Harmony Through Sound and Music.

Oh and by the way again- I am very excited that I have gone from typically less than 20 page views a month on my blog to 129 yesterday!

So again, a big shout out to Winnie Kao, creator of Your Turn Challenge, and Seth Godin whose work was the inspiration behind it, to all my Facebook Your Turn Challenge new friends, supporters and motivators who on some level I answer to every day and look to for continued inspiration. Also to all the people, friends known and unknown, who "like" my Wholistic Sound Facebook page, who are members of my Sound Body Wholistic Health Center Facebook page, who read this blog, who come for sessions, workshops, sound journeys and meditations and to my four amazing sons- Namdev, Moose, Ben and Nic- who I believe have all come to appreciate that I am always pushing the envelope and know I will always support and encourage them when they want to do the same, do something daring, think outside the box, take a chance, step into the unknown. I love you guys!

Whiplash (When Making Music Isn't Fun Anymore)

Just got back from seeing the movie Whiplash. Pretty rough. Brilliant acting, excellent music.  I hadn't heard of it til I watched the Academy Awards a few nights ago and knew I had to see it. JK Simmons is an amazing actor. I have only seen him in roles where he was loving, kind, gentle, sad- all the sweetest sides of being human. In this film he is utterly abusive, cruel, shaming and humiliating his students, ostensibly to push them toward manifesting their potential for greatness, if it is indeed there. The obvious question, does the end justify the means?

I have strong opinions about that due to my own past history. I once lived with a man with that type of personality- a rage-aholic and perfectionist to an extreme. He was the symptom for my self-loathing at that time in my life. It did not make for a happy household and I think took years for my sons to get over (think This Boy's Life)- in truth I think that it's nothing short of a miracle that they have turned out as amazing and functional and healthy as they have. They certainly had their work cut for them.

As for me, I eventually bottomed out on self-abuse (which is really how I see that relationship) and with a lot of work and commitment to myself, initially through the 12 Steps, then (and now) A Course in Miracles and a lot of transformational sound healing work I learned to forgive myself and eventually to love myself.

The gifts that came from that journey are that today I have a wonderful loving open relationships with each of my sons and that my understanding of low self-worth, lack of empowerment, and issues with addiction and codependence have made me a very sensitive healer. In my work, the most powerful thing I can offer to anyone is a safe space where they feel nurtured and free to be the fullest manifestation of who they are for the period of time that they are on the table- whether it is happy, sad, vulnerable, hurting... whatever. The sound and music assist in creating that space but ultimately the task lies with me and the space and intention that I hold and that the client and I co-create together.

So there were gifts. Do I think that justifies how those gifts were realized? Although I am grateful for who I am and where I am today both inwardly and outwardly, no, most definitely not. I think we in the modern Western world for the most part live in an extremely dysfunctional society. There are cultures where people have been raised with love and kindness from start to finish. That is the norm and they produce kind and loving people and I'm sure that their gifts for art, science, music, healing- whatever they may be- flourish in environment where they are nurtured and given permission to flourish.

My friend and master drummer from Senegal, Papa Malick Faye, told us when he was teaching drumming at the center how in his culture when a person has some kind of an emotional or mental break that all the drummers and dancers in the village go to that person's house and they drum for him or her and the women dance for 7 days and 7 nights. After the 7 days the person "has his mind back". There are very specific rhythms for all of the different issues that confront the people and also rhythms for every other event. When Malick was a little boy and was sent to the store, if he took too long his father would drum to let him know it was time to come home. When a person died in the village it was through drumming that they sent the message to all the people. I learned an African lullabye from a village where whenever a child is born the mother composes a lullabye for the child and then teaches it to all the people in the village in case something happens to her or she has to go away, so that no matter who is with the child it will feel safe and comforted.

Chill Music

I came across a similar video earlier today and was fascinated by it- stunning, both visually and sonically. I couldn't access it to upload but you can click here to watch it. I had seen some of the instruments before- the percussion ones and the horns but the cello and harp knocked me out! So beautiful... such extraordinary sounds.

As for some of my other personal inspiration today, I met with a woman whom I had "randomly" met in the grocery store last week. She has a very entrepreneurial spirit and has started a number of great businesses locally, one of them being one of the best restaurants in Newport- cool, funky and eclectic with consistently great food for over 20 years. We were discussing her latest venture, which is helping other small businesses get off the ground. After about five minutes (yes, I'm a little slow) I said, "Well, maybe you could help me." Here I am reconfiguring my business which, in its most recent incarnation, was a sound healing center open to the public on a daily basis for 7 years. Now, after a three year period of transition, it is in my home and I am still in the process of discerning what parts of the old formula I can use, what new pieces can be integrated, and what is to be either eliminated from the equation or transformed in some way to accomodate the space I am now in. So yes, I can use some help from a seasoned and successful entrepreneur who has both vision and know how in putting it all together

So she came out to my house, had a ride on the sound table (which she loved- surprise, surprise!) and we spent three hours discussing the numerous projects that I would like to bring to fruition- my private sessions, my book, traveling and teaching, offering individual sound healing retreats, integrating Expressive Art Therapy into my session work, creating short videos, recordings and more. (The "more" is still a secret project!)

So, I am excited!

Files, Piles and Binaural Beats

Having moved in October after being in temporary and transitional living spaces since spring of 2012, I got relatively settled in my new house pretty quickly. It had been a long time coming and I was "ready". People who come to visit are always surprised to see that it is pretty well set up and feels, as they say, as though I have lived here forever- in the best sense of that phrase! That being said, I still have some boxes and plastic tubs stashed away in closets and little storage spaces that they don't ever see. Once every couple of weeks or so, when I'm feeling adventurous, I haul out another box or two and put away some more books or art supplies, or the odd grouping of nonessential instruments. This week I discovered all my Sanskrit books, workbooks, notebooks and practice pads which is very exciting for me.

Last night I decided it's time to organize paperwork as I have an appointment with a tax person coming up fairly soon. (They called me this a.m. and told me they have to postpone my appointment for tomorrow until two weeks from now- looking at all my papers I breathed a sigh of relief!) So, at this moment, instead of my living room feeling like the sacred space- or at least relaxing space- that I like it to be, the floor is covered with paperwork! Some of it is from the last two years but the bulk of it is 7 years worth of files from my sound healing center- time to reorganize it and figure out where it's going to go. I use the word "file" loosely- most is in files but some is in piles- piles that need to be filed!

This morning I was feeling some anxiety and there was a lot of internal chatter going on with regard to old family stuff and between that and looking at my living room floor I thought, "This is a job for brain tuners!" The brain tuners are a very effective sound healing tool that use binaural beats to shift one's state of consciousness. Here is a description by John Beaulieu, inventor of the Biosonic Brain Tuners and developer of Biosonic Repatterning:
"Brain Tuners are based on brain wave studies using electroencephalography (EEG) technology to map different states of consciousness known as Delta, Theta, Alpha, and Beta. Delta is associated with deep sleep. Theta is associated with meditation and dream states. Alpha is associated with relaxed awareness, creativity, and heightened learning. Beta is associated with high alertness and focus.

When the Brain Tuners are simultaneously sounded – one in the left ear and the other in the right ear – the two hemispheres of the brain function together to integrate the two sounds, creating a third, different tone called a binaural beat. When the Fundamental Brain Tuner tuning fork is sounded with a Delta, Theta, Alpha, or Beta tuning fork the difference between the two tuning forks creates a binaural beat which is heard as a pulsation. The binaural beat gently signals the brain to shift into a different state of consciousness."

 I have been using the brain tuners for quite a few years now and sometimes carry them around with me like a sonic toolkit.  Today I was sitting at my kitchen table feeling a little jagged and thought I would first use the alpha tuner to relax my mind and then the beta tuner to help me get organized. I tapped the alpha tuners, held them up next to my ears, closed my eyes and sank into the frequency. When I opened my eyes I saw my kitchen. What I mean by that is that I saw my kitchen- I mean, I have a really great space! I know this, but I hadn't actually seen it for weeks. It was as if I suddenly woke up. All the unproductive internal dialogue was suddenly quiet and I realized how myopic my vision had been for weeks. My vision suddenly became as expansive and open as the space around me.

I was completely calm, completely at peace and the ability to be productive and creative took over. I never did use the beta tuners because relaxing my mind was actually all that I needed to shift my energy and start getting things done. Very cool!